-Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind-
(Dr Seuss quotes -American Writer & Cartoonist, 1904 - 1991)

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Labor pain experience - Part 3 - Phase 3

After going through this agony for quite some time, Dr Damo dropped by to see how I was doing. All I could do was to cry and cry and cry. He smiled with a pitiful expression, to me it was as if he knew the pain. While he was standing at the edge of my bed, he gently lifted up my legs with the assistance from the midwife and next thing I know.. I was peeing a pail of water uncontrollably! That’s right. Dr Damo had officially broke my water bag. Plus point though, no pain on that. Maybe because the contractions has overcome this. The contractions has now reached to what I believe is at it’s peak. I didn’t know when to push but the pain was so great that my instinct tells me to push. But the nurses kept saying.. hold on.. don’t waste your energy, it’s not the right time yet. Instead, breathe.. follow the breathing method and it might help. As much as I wanted to listen to her advise, because anything I could do to reduce the pain, I would want to do it. But the truth is, it wasn’t easy. At that state, it seems like you are trapped in a world of your own. A world filled with nothing but intense pain. I clinched on my hands around my hubby’s fingers so tightly that he too felt the pain. The pain of his fingers being clinched too hard in between the wedding band. After some time, I think he too couldn’t take the pain and he excused himself reassuring me he’ll be back very soon.

Eventually, the need to push took place. It is as if, your body commands you to push and with all the strength I had, I begin to push. Even the midwife wasn’t prepared for that because although she did tell me to notify her the moment I felt like pushing, I didn’t have the time and energy to do so. I guess the saying is true; action speaks louder than words. She had to hurriedly call for Dr Damo. In the meantime, I pushed at every time the urge appears. So here’s the thing that you have to remember, push only when you have the urge to do so, otherwise you will be really wasting your energy if you try to push too soon. And try to breathe the breathing technique that you have been taught because, to me.. it did helped a bit. Believe me, at that time, anything that is a bit means a lot.

Finally, at about almost 3pm, Dr Damo came in again and this time he was dressed prepared for the delivery. As I was pushing with all my heart, he instructed me when to stop. But by then, the urge to push has become so overwhelming that you'll be blowing and panting and all you want to do is just push and push and push! But I was a good girl. I managed to follow Dr Damo’s instruction and after awhile he cut my opening slightly more. Yes yes I know it sounds scary but the truth again, it is not painful. Seriously, you won't feel the cut at all. Anyway, that was when my husband came rushing in to the room for no one had time to inform him earlier until Dr Damo noticed him not being around. I have to give my hubby credit for not fainting on the spot as that was the time my baby's head has reached the opening. And after 2 more forceful pushes following Dr Damo’s instructions, out came little Rosemary baby.

Very quickly, Dr Damo placed little Rosemary baby on my chest. Weakly, I looked up to see my husband and there he stood, stunned and with tears streaming down his cheeks. I turned to look down at my little angel again and there, right before my eyes, the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, and the most beautiful cry I have ever heard was just there, right on my chest. I was in awe and it took me a few seconds to realize that I was crying too. This time though I was crying with joy. I did it. An intense relief slowly emerged and I was thanking god for the safe delivery and I was happy that it was all over. Exhausted as I may be, I was thrilled and I couldn’t wait to see my baby again knowing that she’s safe in good hands and of course, you can imagine my hubby happily trotting to the nursery room.....

Of course, the delivery procedure was not over. Dr Damo had to remove the placenta and do some stitching. But at this point, you'll be too tired to feel anymore pain. Best is to just lie down and try to catch some sleep while you still can.

Labor pain experience - Part 3 - Phase 2

About 8.30am, my hubby arrived and while he was sitting next to me, the morning duty nurse dropped by and gently told me to take a bath after my breakfast as I will be sent off to the delivery room in less than half an hour’s time. As difficult as it
was, I made my way to the bathroom and when I came out, the same nurse was already waiting for me. As I got onto my bed, she told me to lie down and obediently I did as she told me to pull up my garment and lie sideways. I thought to myself, oh gosh.. not again! This time though, she pushed something into my the other opening!! Seriously, I didnt know that I have to be “molested” so many times!! This is crazy! Eventually I found out that they inserted enema, which is necessary so that you will poo out all the stuffs in your intestines because really, you don’t want to be pooing all those stuffs out while pushing your baby.

Finally, at about almost 9 plus in the morning, I was wheeled to the delivery room. While the contractions has somehow subsided a bit, it was still a very uncomfortable feeling as I didn’t have any sleep the night before and I guess I was just pretty overwhelmed by the contractions. While I was lying down patiently on the delivery room bed, one of the midwives came and put me on drips. Drips to induce. Let me tell you this. This is seriously one hell of an effective induction method. In less than 30 minutes, I was already crying out in pain. And yet, the midwife told me… relax.. relax.. this is only the beginning. I mean.. how can this be only the beginning when the pain is so unbearable!! My whole tummy was so aching, you name them... cramps, stabbing, twisting, pulling, it really felt like my whole tummy was rotating clock & anti clock wise. I am not trying to frighten you but really, the pain is toe-curling. I would be lying if I told you child birth is as easy as pooping.

But here's the thing I wish to highlight. Today, looking back, I can tell you that I did a pretty good job and yes, I would want to have a 2nd child. The truth is women are born to be able to take this pain. You are actually stronger than you think. So the next time a guy comes up and tell you that women are weak, go right up and punch his face!

Labor pain experience - Part 3 - Phase 1

I have to apologize now that it took me awhile to post this up. Thanks to the long weekend which means I would have limited internet access… Anyway, here it is and because this part 3 is the most important part of all the parts, I have to break it down to smaller parts i.e. Phase 1, Phase 2 and Phase 3 to make this article easier to read…

On the 7th of Sept 2010, it was a hot afternoon and I thought I deserved a nice hefty lunch. And so, I indulged myself to a mouth-watering banana leave rice. Yummy! Finally in the late afternoon, I got myself admitted to the hospital. I am telling you this. I was way too anxious, way too scared and way too impatient. I began to imagine that I had contractions but of course, it was merely imaginations. I got my little cupboard which stood next to my bed, packed up with lots of maternity pads, (very important ya because trust me, after delivery, you will need ample of that), and filled the drawer sections with my toiletries stuffs. I got my hubby to buy a few magazines for me too since I will be spending my time alone in the night. (Yup, the hospital didn’t allow anybody to stay overnight)

At about 9.30pm, after a simple dinner, the nurses came in to check my dilation. Okay, let me tell you this. Checking on the dilation means the nurse would have to shove her fingers into my opening! The more fingers in, means the wider the dilation has become. And believe me, it’s not a pleasant feeling. After murmuring to each other, they left my place. I was beginning to think maybe they will be sending me home again! But less than 30 minutes later, one of the nurses that stood there watching while I was being checked on my dilation came back with a small thing that looks like a little tube. And after instructing me to pull my legs up, she pulled up my hospital garment and warned me that it’s going to feel slightly uncomfortable. And next thing I know, she inserted some tablet into the opening! Mind you, my heart was pounding and I have no idea what was the procedure for until later on, a senior nurse came by to visit me and told me I have just been induced and that contractions should developed in about 30 minutes. As I gasped in fright, she smiled and assured me that the contraction that is about to come is only the beginning and it’s still a long way more to come for the real thing.

In about almost less than an hour, I began to have contractions. And now that I know how contractions felt like, I am never going to complain about period pain ever again! The nurse’s words kept ringing on my mind… this is just the beginning.. this is just the beginning… just the beginning. How can this be just the beginning when I am already in pain. I fear to think more.

What was about to come was beyond anyone’s imagination. Put it this way, it felt like someone really heavy weighted, sits on your stomach, and at the same time pinching your tummy hard and twisting the side of your stomach with no mercy and that kind of pain lasts for about 30 seconds. And then, it stops. Occasionally I can feel my little baby kicking me aggressively. And the pain emerged again after about 10 minutes later. Imagine that! And this went on the whole night. Yup, let me tell you again. From about 10 plus till the next morning. All I could do was to cry alone while sending text messages to Joe and my husband who was pretty helpless as he couldn’t be with me.

Labor pain experience - Part 2

I remembered on one night, I had what I thought was contractions. At that time, I wasn’t sure if it was contractions but it felt like tummy cramps. It wasn’t painful, it was just quite uncomfortable. But since it was bearable, I waited until the following day. The mild cramps was still going on so I decided to see my gynae. Upon arriving, the reception got me on the priority list and within minutes, a doctor attended to me. As he was a new doctor and my gynae was not around on that day, he called my gynae up and after a while he came back and said he was going get me admitted. I was thrilled. Wow, this is finally happening. Joe, my best friend was anxious when I told her I am getting admitted, yes, the Godma to be of my child at that time was so happy that she broke the news to her family too.

The next day, my gynae, Dr Damo dropped by and checked on my dilation. Turned out to be, it was a false alarm! He said it’s nowhere near 1cm! Sigh, and here I am "texting" everyone that I am going to delivery! So shy.. blekkk

In fact, I was confused because it was already end of August 2010 but then, Dr Damo told me things like that happens (due date delays) and that very likely, I will deliver only in the 1st week of September. And so I had to go back and continue walking.

I was in again the hospital a few more days later but again…another false alarm. Everyone commented.. oh little Rosemary is getting very comfortable in her water bed. Not to mention too, she was very active and did a lot of kicking in my tummy. My interpretation of kicking would be dancing moves in my tummy. Even Godma commented that she is probably latin dancing in there, following in mommy’s footsteps. Silently….. I was sooo proud. Hehe..

My next follow up visit was on 4th of September and upon consultation, Dr Damo told me… "looks like we’re going to have her on the 8th September 10"! My heart skipped a beat. That’s such an important date to me. It’s Mother Mary’s birthday! Wow. I went home smiling at every point I thought of that.

Did I mention that I had a hard time getting a comfy sleeping position? Oh yes, towards the 3rd trimester and especially on the 8th month onwards, it was extremely uncomfortable and I had many sleepless nights. They say that this is actually mother’s nature way of “training” a mother to be, to be mentally prepared with the upcoming sleepless nights! I think that is so true.

To be continued in Part 3..

Labor pain experience - Part 1

As I am writing about my delivery experience here, I am seriously thinking about it again.. should I really share on something that is pretty personal? But then I thought, some of my friends are about to experience this and so I totally understand your excitements and the tons of questions you have on mind. For me, I remembered clearly that I had a lot of question marks on my mind too, especially with “The Day” drawing closer. And at every opportunity striked, I asked a good friend of mine, Aliza with many “technical” questions (if you know what I mean, the crucial in-depth information about the delivery process ) Hmm…actually, to be honest, I was more interested to know about the pain. “How’s it going to be like? Was it painful? Ok, re-phrase - was it very, very painful? Will I be able to bear the pain? How does a contraction feels like?” And so much more, too many to list down here! And since she has 2 kids already, I completely depended on her stories and got myself mentally and fearfully prepared. Sigh, looking back now, thank you so much Aliza for sharing your stories, and thanks also to Ann Nye…

So back to my sharing now, to make it easier for my dear readers, I shall divide this story into 3 parts. The 1st part shall consists of my brief preparation close to the delivery date, where else the 2nd part shall be about the day I got myself admitted and last but not least, “the Day” on part 3.

Part 1

Flash back… It was probably 3 weeks to my due date, 31st August 2009. As you can see in the picture that I posted from my previous article, I was huge… And because I was so worried that I may have a hard time pushing my little baby out when the time comes, I decided to walk a lot. Mind you, with my elephant weight + exercising + on a hot weather = it’s a really a very tough job. But I had to. And so, to solve the hot weather issue, I decided to walk from one end to the other end in my favourite Jusco shopping mall. It’s still an exercise anyway.. except for it’s in an air-conditioned place. Hehe..

Anyway, I walked like twice or thrice a week in Jusco. I think I was there so frequently that perhaps some Jusco staff who’ve seen me many times probably thought that I’m working with the management, secretly inspecting on their work performance! Even the achi aunty cleaner asked me why am I still walking about so actively when I look like I’m going to pop any minute. But I walked anyway. I think, if I can recall correctly, I quit walking only on the week of my due date.

To be continued in Part 2..

Me in ad...? Seeing is believing :)

I can't believe my eyes when my mom showed me this advertisement clip recently. I was in this ad when I was like... 10 years old? And after so many years, my mom managed to retrieve this ad from one of her VCRs.

Honestly, it's weird to watch yourself in TV but...at the same time, hey..this is so sentimental to me! Here you go... see if you can spot me!

Who says cows are not smart.. ?

Last weekend, while driving pass Jaya Jusco on a heavy rainy day, guess what we saw?

A herd of cows taking shelter under a sheltered pedestrian walkway. This is really funny! Imagine all of them standing, really close to each other, probably to stay warm. But they had to move you see, so when they moved, they ended bumping each others backside. I think eventually one of them got fed up and got out from the walkway and stood under the rain. Really a funny sight!

Even cows are smart to know not to get wet and to take shelter from the pouring rain except for that one impatient fellow!

Mother's Day celebration

Recently, we celebrated Mother's Day at Burger King, Klang. It was just a small outing after mass. Simple but meaningful :)

My dearest mother in law with her grandson :)

Little Rosemary with her wonderful grandparents!

Mother's Day cake specially for my mother in law.. A delicious blueberry cake. Yummy!

My first mother's day celebration with my precious princess. :)

My sister in law with her hubby :)

Ahhh.. and then evening was dinner session with my parents. I couldn't take much pictures as my battery was running low :( But I'm petty sure my brothers captured a few. Hope to get them soon to post it up here!

To my mom and my mother in law, here's a special message for you....

Children's health. Is it our responsibilities?

It surprises me at times when I see things that shouldn’t be happening…happens. For instance, I walk pass a restaurant and upon seeing a mother carrying her child, I can’t help but to smile. Then as I take a quick glimpse at the child’s father, my blood began to boil. What the heck… the child’s father is having a good time puffing away. This is a typical inconsiderate scenario that happens every time and anywhere. It doesn’t take a genius to know that it is extremely unhealthy for a person to inhale 2nd hand smoke, what more a child !!

I may not know exactly what are the many other sicknesses that are caused by 2nd hand smokers but I do know one thing for sure… children who are exposed to environment like that are definitely not in a healthy environment and I know also that these children are more likely to suffer from pneumonia, bronchitis, asthma and not to mention, cancer!! We all know that cigarettes contain many harmful chemicals, so why can’t this father just don’t smoke. Sacrifice a bit for his child should be the right thing to do! If he’s desperate to have one, go walk far, far away and smoke for all we care!

2nd typical scenario, have you come across some kids, wondering about barefooted in shopping mall/streets, even with their parents around? Don’t get me wrong. I do know that bare foot walking is good for your feet. I know that it gives relaxation to the tired feet and it also helps to allow your toes to get straightened. But in this case, it's different. It is so unhygienic to allow a child to walk about barefooted on dirty floors and then only God knows if these kids wash their feet after that! Children can get tape worms if these parasites are present and by penetrating the soles of a child's bare foot.

A close friend of mine just shared with me a horrifying email. This email is about a child who had to go through a surgery to remove 3 kgs of tape worm from his intestines!! Okay, maybe this child didn’t get these worms by walking barefooted on streets, but we all know for the fact that it is all due to poor hygiene. And who is to be blamed? A child would not know how to practice proper hygiene and therefore, it is our responsibilities as parents to teach them!

In an interview between the doctor and the father as written in the email, apparently the father replied that this is a very common thing for his child to have worms as each time after he's being fed with medication, it is expected that he will pass out motion with worms! That is so terrible! Precautionary steps should have been taken after the 1st incident! It breaks my heart to see this poor child had to go through such a trauma. What makes it even more depressing is, this is supposedly an avoidable situation. As the email came with real life pictures, it's even more heart wrenching. I don't think I want to put the pictures here as it maybe disturbing to some readers. The bottom line is we really need to take concern of our children health and hygiene.

Finding the right feeding bottle for your baby

I would like to share with you on my experience about finding the right feeding bottle for my baby girl. The first thing that came into my mind when the thought of getting a feeding bottle is this brand called Avent. Not only it’s a famous brand but it is very well known for its anti colic effect. Ask any mothers and she’ll tell you the reason she buys Avent drinking bottles. Babies suffering from colic is no joke. The crying itself is enough to make us feel anxious and desperate to find ways to take the pain away. The worst stress of all is if we have tried all methods to soothe her pain and yet it didn’t work. That is why to me and to many mothers out there, choosing the right feeding bottle is indeed, in our top priority list.

And so, I purchased 4 Avent bottles – 2 of size 4 oz and towards her 3rd month, another 2 bottles of size 9 oz, not to mention another set for my mother in law who takes care of little Rosemary during the day. We used to love the 4oz bottles because of its special anti-colic feature and the different stages of nipples according to baby’s age. However, I have stopped loving this product after purchasing the 9 oz bottles. I discovered that the milk leaks! Oh yes, the milk would pour out from under the ring and it is so annoying especially when it happens in the middle of the night!

Imagine this scenario: while feeding your baby, you soon realized that your baby’s shirt is all wet and you have no choice but to pull the bottle away from your baby gently. Baby doesn’t understand why you did that and she probably thought you have stopped feeding her and instantly she cried out loud!! There you are, in a chaotic situation, trying to re-screw the ring again and again and finally just when you think you got it right, you shake the bottle to test and then you discover..milk is splattered everywhere! Frustrating, isn’t it? Honestly, out of 10, 8 times my poor baby ended up all messed up with her shirt extremely wet from the leaking milk. Believe me, I have tried all kind of ways to rectify the problem, by re-screwing the lid over and over again, but it never worked! Even better, when I tried to find a solution through Google, I was surprised to see that there are so many write ups on this leaking issue. Don’t believe me? Just type on Complaints on Avent bottles and you’ll be amazed to see the results displayed.

In the end, we consulted the baby store that we normally go to quite recently. Remember I mentioned about this store when I purchased a teether for little Rosemary ? Well, the seller recommended me another brand called Dr. Browns. As you know by then, I was quite desperate to find a right feeding bottle. At the same time, I was skeptical. Partially because of the cost. If I can recall correctly, Dr Browns feeding bottle is just as costly as Avent bottles. But I had to try. As a result, I purchased 2 bottles.

Today I am telling you, I have no regrets. I will recommend Dr Browns bottle to any mothers. I love it because, very importantly, it DOES NOT LEAK! Also, it comes with a vent system. I was told that the air never mixes with the formula/breastmilk, thus, it minimizes oxidation and apparently helps to maintain important nutrients like Vitamin C, A and E. If you see the picture, you will probably get an idea how it works.

I am very disappointed with Avents feeding bottles but that does not mean I am against with all of their products. In my previous blog, I have found a suitable teether for little Rosemary and it’s from Avent anyway. But I have to say this; I am extremely pleased with Dr Browns feeding bottles and I hope you will too :)

H1N1 flu Vaccination

I finally got my H1N1 flu vaccination jab yesterday from Klinik Kok and Wendy in Bukit Tinggi, Klang. To my opinion, I think it’s really important to make an effort to get this sort of flu vaccination since it’s available in the market now. If I am not mistaken, you can get it for free in government hospitals, or even not, you probably pay just a minimum amount. In fact, I have to admit, I got mine pretty late. I should have went for this shot much earlier considering the fact that I have a baby now. Just to share, do you know that as of 5 May 2010 in Malaysia itself, it has been reported that a total of 13889 people have been infected with H1N1? Yup, get this facts from our Ministry of Health website; http://h1n1.moh.gov.my.

It’s scary, come to think of it. When you are out there perhaps in shopping malls or at work you wouldn’t know who are infected with H1N1, because unlike a person who’s infected with chicken pox for instance, you can see the signs! That’s why if you ask me, I think it’s really important for each one of us to make an effort to get this flu vaccination. At least you’ll have a peace of mind lah if you get stuck in a crowded lift or happened to walk past someone who sneeze on your face! Oh well, as the saying goes; prevention is better than cure!

For more information, do go to this website and read the H1N1 Vaccine Frequently Asked Questions. I find it pretty informative.

Also, since I got my H1N1 flu vaccination shot from Sanofi Aventis’s product, read more on the vaccination here.

Sanofi Aventis H1N1 Vaccination

Since I found out from this article that babies from age 6 months and above can take this shot, I will consult my doctor again and if all is OK, oh yes.. little Rosemary is going to get her jab too!

Remember to consult your doctor :)

Pick up line anybody?

I just got this from a good buddy of mine which he posted it on facebook. I am putting it here to make your day just as he did for me :) Enjoy..


HE: Can I buy you a drink?
SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours too.

HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must've been given your share.

HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

HE: Go on ,don't be shy. Ask me out.
SHE: Okay, get out.

HE: I think I could make you very happy.
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

HE: Shall we go see a movie?
SHE: I've already seen it.

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Hiding from you.

HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

HE: So, what do you do for a living?
SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE: Do not enter.

HE: Your body is like a temple.
SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.

HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

p/s - thanks for the laugh, thomas! :)

Little Rosemary got distracted...!

If you have read my recent article on buying some development toys for little Rosemary, ever since then, my husband and I have been "training" her with these toys. Last weekend, we tried to capture little Rosemary solving a game puzzle. Just to briefly explain about this "toy puzzle", I hid a little ball beneath 3 bowl covers and usually little Rosemary is able to reveal the ball by opening up the bowl one by one.

In my previous article on little Rosemary talking, I mentioned that if little Rosemary sees us with a camera, she'll stop whatever that she was doing and would just stare back at the camera. And so we'll have to wait for another golden opportunity. This time, my husband tried to capture again in a "hush hush" way but guess what.... a failed attempt. Watch and you'll know what I mean! :)

A picture of my ballet performance, those were the days!

Remember I mentioned in my previous article on my new found love, that I will try to look for some old pictures of my..those dancing days? Guess what?? :) Managed to dig through some old folders and woo hoo! found one!! After seeing this picture, I'm missing ballet even more now...

A nightmare confinement lady

In chinese culture, it is very common that after the mother gives birth, she hires a confinement lady to help her with the household duties, especially to take care of the newborn since new mothers may not know how to handle a newborn. Plus, after 9 months of pregnancy and delivery, it is important for mothers to fully recuperate. I believe in many other cultures too, mothers have to adhere to the do’s and don’t’s such as not allowed to take bath, wash hair..etc..etc though honestly…I never really followed the “dos and don’ts” !

Anyway, like any other new mothers, I engaged a confinement lady from an agency which I sourced from the net. I thought engaging one through an agency gives me some sort of security, meaning to say, should my engagement lady did a bad job, I could ask the agency to send me a replacement.

So on the day that I was discharged from the hospital, my husband went to the agency to pick up the confinement lady, lets just call her CL and brought her over to the hospital. I felt that she appeared to be pretty experience from the way she spoke of her past jobs but it turned out, I was so wrong! I think any experience confinement lady should know that when a newborn is fed with formula milk brand A, the newborn will have to stick on with that brand at least until she reaches +/- 6 months. It frustrates me so much also because while I was trying to BF my baby, CL kept sitting in front of me, saying my flow is not good and that I shouldn’t waste any more time to BF. Being vulnerable and miserable, I gave in to her and told her to mix the formula milk for my newborn. Little did I know that she took the milk formula given complimentary by my agency to feed my newborn. I am aware that she knew the hospital has given me a sample pack of the formula milk that they have been feeding my newborn since day 1 because at the time the nurse was briefing me, she was there…observing and listening. And the nurse highlighted to us that we must feed her with this formula milk only. What I didn't know was, she took the agency's complimentary milk formula to feed my baby. I became worried because my newborn was not able to sleep the whole night and sometimes I even hear her whining softly. My poor baby. When I asked CL why isn't my baby asleep and why is she so restless, as if in pain. She said.. oh it’s normal for newborn to behave that way.

With no sleep the night before, I brought my baby back to the hospital first thing in the morning. Immediately the nurses asked me.. which formula milk did I feed her with and when I checked with the CL, she said.. Oh, I gave her the milk that my agency gave you. I could have strangled her. Really! Because of her ignorance, my baby had a tummy upset and that's not good for a newborn!! That explains her sleepless night. I think she knew that I was not happy with her and so she decided to quit, giving an excuse that she got hurt while running up & down from the staircase in my home. Fine. In fact, I suspected too that she was not happy for the fact that I insisted to sleep in the same room with my baby and with her. (Normally, CL sleeps in the same room with the baby only) Oh well, the agency sent a 2nd CL the following day.

2nd CL seems pretty good. Of course, having a stranger in your home, both parties must give in and learn to adapt each other’s method and we understood that. There were a lot of teachings and learning from both sides. But my husband and I have come to a conclusion to take turns to take care of our baby and CL only needs to cook and clean for me. I have no choice because CL had a sensitive nose and can you imagine, while feeding my baby, she blows her nose? It’s damn disgusting. Not to mention too, she farts a lot in the night. So much that I had to ask her to sleep on her own, in a separate room. Yup, a room all for herself. So anyway, 2 weeks passed. On the 3rd week, I decided to visit my kitchen. (You see, supposedly, I am only allowed to stay in the room with my baby and not allowed to climb the stairs for at least a month) To my horror, I discovered my kitchen cabinet was full of ants, you name it. red ants, black ants, small & big ants..! My wok was not washed and the oil had hardened. My stove was oily and dirty and when I checked the back of my stove.. I nearly fainted. I saw bits of garlic, strands of vegetables and lots of other stuffs there.. I really believe that the whole kitchen was not cleaned and mopped since the 1st day she started. I was so furious! I questioned her and like a kelam kabut chicken, she ran here and there trying to organize everything back to order. Eventually I found out too that she lied to me on a few things. You see, I love to eat brown rice but I had to stop eating because CL the 2nd told me it’s not good for me to eat since I just delivered. So like bodoh (stupid) I listened to her. This time when I pressed her again for the real reason for not cooking brown rice for me, she told me it is because she didn’t like to eat brown rice! Can you believe it ?? I also found out from my husband that she has been lepaking, sometimes even lie down on our couch, eating kuachis while watching her 3pm hokkien drama series every afternoon! But she is smart. She asked my husband's permission first and my husband felt that it was hard to say NO because things like that, you shouldn't even ask in the first place!

In the end, I called up the agency and said I want to terminate the service but I hold back my anger and just told the agency, we do not need her anymore. Of course there was no refund. Besides, as much as I am angry at her, I don’t have the heart to cut off her pay since in the beginning she had told me once never to send her back home earlier than 1 month, otherwise her neighbours will laugh at her. In a way, I do feel sorry for her if at all that is true. And according to the Chinese customs, we have to give her a red packet when she leaves. I gave her only 50 bucks considering that she still gets the final week pay even though for not doing anything. And do you know what she did? As soon as she got into the cab, she called my husband, asking him why did he gave her only 50 bucks and not more? Seriously, this is what you call thick skinned.

Finally, I made it a point to voice out my frustration to the agency. It was a nightmare, really. Instead of being spare from doing household work for that month, ended up I had more to do just to clean up her mess and honestly, to engage a CL like that for 3k ++... is really not worth it at all! I am never going to engage another CL again. Never!